


S.A.D.

by albafee



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Kiss Kiss Fall in Love, Seasonal Affective Disorder, Sick Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-10-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:22:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25639450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/albafee/pseuds/albafee
Summary: It's winter and Ino is not feeling it. Maybe Sakura is the remedy she needs.COMPLETE, fluffy multi-chapter, short work
Relationships: Haruno Sakura & Yamanaka Ino, Haruno Sakura/Yamanaka Ino
Comments: 16
Kudos: 122





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> first F/F piece, first sakuino/inosaku fic. pls be nice.
> 
> tw: brief mention of dieting

Ino was always highly attuned to nature. More than she gave herself credit for. When they were little, she taught Sakura to tell when it was going to rain by the way the leaves turned upside down. She said she could taste it, too, and feel the barometric pressure drop, and when a big storm was coming she could feel the lightning tingle on her skin. When they were out gathering flowers or herbs, Ino was always the first to find what they were looking for. Sometimes she also found rare plants that Sakura never would have seen. She claimed to carry a lighter around so she wouldn’t have to hear Shikamaru whine if he lost his, but Sakura knew it was to burn invasive plant species after she ripped them up. Ino knew long before she dabbled in medicine how to make tonics and teas from things in the woods, how to make salves and ointments. These were all things Sakura would have attributed to being the daughter of florists, except every once in a while Ino’s father would shake his head and say, “Where do you learn such clever things?” and Sakura’s intuition would be proven wrong yet again.

For all its benefits, Ino’s connection with nature wasn’t always a good thing. Sometimes when the weather changed too rapidly, she got sick. Headaches, usually, but sometimes colds and flus, too. She was a health nut, constantly urging Sakura to try new diets and vitamins and workout routines. She never skipped her vaccines and boosters. She normally was one of the healthiest, most active people in the village. Yet something as benign as the weather could knock her down. 

Sakura was the first to notice a pattern to Ino’s moods. Winter was her least favorite season. “Everything’s dead and there’s no sun and nothing’s green and I’m stuck inside and when I’m not I’m freezing my ass off and it fucking  _ sucks _ ,” she’d ranted, more than once. Sakura learned long ago that when Ino vented, she was not looking for solutions. She just wanted to express her feelings, have them acknowledged, and then move on. Fair enough. Sakura herself was much more solution-oriented, so sometimes it was difficult to just sit and listen without problem-solving, but for the sake of their friendship, she learned. Anger was one of the easier emotions for Ino to express, so that’s usually where she began. From there it would branch into frustration, anxiety, insecurity… whatever it was she was  _ really _ feeling. Her wintery tirades ended in the same thing every time- “I dunno, I just feel like shit and it’s  _ aggravating _ . I wanna be productive and go out and just live my life, but I’m so tired all the time…” Once she had her little breakdown, she was usually fine, albeit more moody and withdrawn than usual. Sakura assumed it was just the cold- lots of people get a little distant in wintertime- and let her be.

The last two winters seemed to wear down on Ino more than usual. She took time off- she  _ never _ took time off- “to relax for a bit,” she’d said. There were times where they wouldn’t speak for days. Not because they were fighting, either. It was for no reason at all. Ino started declining invitations to go out. Another extremely uncharacteristic behavior. The final straw for Sakura was wandering into the shop one day to check on her and finding her mother up front instead. 

She cocked her head to the side.

“Mrs. Yamanaka? It’s been a while since I saw you at the register.” The woman shrugged.

“Ino wanted to work on arrangements in the back.” Sakura couldn’t help the way her eyes narrowed in suspicion. 

“Really? That’s unlike her.” Her mother merely shrugged again.

“The child is an enigma.”

“Do you think she’d mind if I went back and visited with her for a bit?” She waved a dismissive hand.

“You can try.”

Sakura walked around the counter and pushed aside the curtain partition. Ino was sitting at a long table, cutting stems. She had a large arrangement in front of her, and many finished ones behind her. Sakura could tell immediately this wasn’t meant for a customer, and perhaps not even for anyone at all. This was just for Ino.

She quietly took a seat nearby, not wanting to crowd her. Ino didn’t acknowledge her presence, but Sakura knew she noticed her. She was too good a ninja  _ not _ to notice. She watched her continue to cut stems, layer and rearrange flowers and foliage, tie fishing line to create shapes. Sakura and Ino must have sat there an hour or two, enjoying each other’s silent companionship. At last, Ino folded her arms on the worktop and slouched, resting her head against them. Her hair and arms obscured her face. Sakura rose, carefully walking all the way around, viewing Ino’s piece from every angle. She had added long, tapering white candles of varying sizes throughout. Every flower had been picked and placed with purpose. It was truly beautiful, truly a masterpiece. Understanding what it all meant only made it more masterful. And heart breaking.  _ Sorrow. Death, Longing. Reaching out toward a flame that will never be lit. Ino, why are you crying inside…?  _ She stopped just shy of Ino’s left shoulder. Ino stirred a little, but did not make a move just yet. The waiting game was Ino’s strong suit.

“Why didn’t you talk to me?” Sakura whispered. Ino shook her head, voice muffled.

“I didn’t know how to say it.” She pressed her hand to Ino’s shoulder now, gently rubbing in circles, trying to give her comfort but not really knowing how.  _ Ino’s always the one to comfort me. I’m not used to it going the other way around…  _

“Ino, what on  _ earth _ have you done?!” 

Her mother had entered. She was angry, face flushed and hands clenched into fists at her side. Ino raised her head.

“How many times do I have to tell you not to waste materials like this?! How am I ever going to sell something so large?!”

“Wedding. Funeral. I dunno,” she replied, resignedly. 

“Do you have any  _ idea _ how much something like this is going to cost?! Nobody is going to buy this! Take it apart this  _ instant _ , young lady! You better be able to salvage this monstrosity into something I can sell or you’ll be grounded for weeks!” Ino’s nails dug into the worktop.  _ Oh no. _

“You can’t ground me, Mother. I’m a ninja. I’m leaving on a mission in two days.”

“I will have your participation canceled!”

“You  _ can’t _ . Don’t you understand? Being a ninja is my  _ job _ . I risk my life for you and all the other ungrateful citizens of this stupid village every time I go out. I am the only Yamanaka of this generation in the field. My skills are  _ irreplaceable.  _ You can’t stop me from going out on missions where I’m needed. It puts the security of the whole village in jeopardy.” 

She rose, hands spread on the table.

“You’re going to have to face there are some things in life you can’t control. And I’m one of them.” She took Sakura’s hand, tugging her toward the back door. “Let’s go, Sakura.”

“ _Excuse_ _me_?! Where do you think you’re going?! Who’s going to fix this mess?!” Ino paused, about to push open the back door, glaring back at her Mother with a coldness sharper than any blizzard. 

“You and Dad are both here. Figure it out.”

Sakura could only give a distressed look back before Ino pulled her through the door. 

They took the rooftops to Sakura’s house. Her parents weren’t home, and she could have bet her life’s savings that Ino needed privacy more than anything else right now. They didn’t speak until they’d climbed through Sakura’s bedroom window together. Ino immediately began undressing, determined to get into a pair of Sakura’s pajamas.  _ She’s so sensitive to her clothes. Wants to be comfy before we talk about anything deep…  _ Sakura sat with her legs in a little M shape on the floor.

“That was a bit harsh, what you said to you mother. Don’t you think?” Ino snorted with her back to Sakura as she stepped into a pair of baggy sweatpants. 

“She’s been harsh on me my whole life. Don’t dish what you can’t take.” She sighed as she unclipped her bra, tossing it toward the foot of the bed. She pulled on a soft long-sleeved shirt and turned back around, pulling her hair out of a ponytail. Sakura got up, gesturing for Ino to take her place, and retrieved a brush from her vanity. She got up onto the bed, patting the spot in front of her. Ino settled on the floor between her feet, allowing Sakura to begin brushing out her hair. She sighed, in relief and frustration all at once. 

“Talk to me.” She hummed, leaning her head back, eyes closed.

“I’m just having a hard time.” Sakura waited patiently for her to continue.  _ She always thinks so hard about how to express her feelings. As if she’s afraid of misrepresenting herself. Will she ever learn that I understand? That she doesn’t need to be so careful with- _ “I think I have depression.”

Sakura paused, only for a moment, quickly recovering and continuing to brush Ino’s hair.

“It’s that bad, huh?” Ino nodded a little.

“I’ve been reading my dad’s books again. I found something I hadn’t noticed before. ‘Seasonal Affective Disorder’. Also known as seasonal depression.” Sakura nodded, unsure of what to say. “I mean, I’ve always hated winter, but the last few I’ve felt… really terrible. It’s almost impossible to get out of bed every morning. I’m always tired and nothing really makes me happy anymore. Everything feels… pointless.” She took a deep, steadying inhale. “It’s so hard. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through. And I’ve gone through a lot.” Sakura nodded in agreement. “I think I need to get some meds or something. I can’t live like this.”

“If you think that will help, then I support you. You deserve to feel okay again.”

Ino didn’t answer. Instead, tears began to streak down her face. Sakura stopped what she was doing, clamoring down and sitting beside her. Ino turned and buried her face in Sakura’s shirt.  _ Oh, okay…  _ She wrapped her arms gingerly around her, holding her. Ino clung desperately, as if Sakura were a life raft in the middle of a dark ocean. 

“I’m sorry!” Ino said between sobs. “I’m sorry, this is so embarrassing, I-”

“Shh. Stop,” Sakura soothed, patting her head. “Don’t be embarrassed. It’s okay to cry in front of friends. It’s okay to rely on others.”

This only made Ino cry harder. Sakura let her.  _ She needs to get it all out before she can move forward. I hate that she bottles everything up like this. It’s no good for her…  _

She was’t sure how long they sat on the floor, but it was long enough that her hips were starting to ache. Ino had calmed to just occasional sniffles, peeling away enough to wipe at her eyes.

“I got your shirt all wet.”

“It’s fine.”

“I got mascara on it.”

“My mom’ll know how to get it out.” 

Ino sat back, allowing Sakura to stand up and stretch. She turned and removed her shirt, deciding to change into pajamas, too. She could feel Ino’s eyes on her. A few years ago, she might have been upset by it. But in the wake of her team’s dissolution and her shift toward a career in medicine, they had become very close. She knew now that Ino’s gaze wasn’t scrutinizing or judgmental. There was a fondness in her eyes when Sakura turned back around, and something like… gratefulness.  _ She doesn’t say it because I can see it. She’s saying thank you…  _ Sakura smiled, a “no problem” on her lips, and Ino smiled back. They climbed onto the bed together, their legs immediately tangling up. They were mirror images of each other, one arm tucked beneath a pillow, blue eyes meeting green. It was early, but it was already getting dark outside. Ino pulled a comforter over them. Even with her red-rimmed eyes and puffy face, she looked… beautiful.  _ She always looks beautiful. In battle, after a good cry… always pretty. If I didn’t like her I’m sure I’d be jealous.  _ Sakura reached out and absently tucked a stray lock of Ino’s hair behind her ear.

“Sakura…” She raised a questioning brow.

“Yes, Ino?” She swallowed.

“I…” She trailed off, shaking her head. “It’s nothing.”

Sakura frowned, holding Ino’s hands.

“Clearly not. What’s wrong?”

“I just… I’m sorry I dragged you into this. And fought with my mom in front of you. It wasn’t… ugh, um…” Sakura smiled, pressing her forehead to Ino’s.

“You didn’t drag me into anything. I came by because I was worried. I’m sad that you’re going through a hard time, but I’m so happy you felt safe coming to me for help. I’m always here for you. That’s what best friends are for.” She pulled back, watching Ino’s expression. She looked almost as if she might cry. “What-”

Their lips met. At first Sakura’s eyes widened in surprise. But Ino felt… desperate. Desperate and longing, just like her flower arrangement, just like her eyes, and Sakura couldn’t help it. She closed her eyes and kissed her back, reassuring her  _ I’m here, I’ll stay _ and Ino replied with  _ I need you, I need you, I need you _ . Their arms wrapped around each other, and their heads titled to press closer together. Ino was warm and soft, and Sakura ran her fingers through her hair. Their kiss separated so Ino could sigh. 

“Was that… okay?” Ino asked.  _ So timid all of a sudden! _

“Yeah,” she found herself saying. “More than okay.”

“I didn’t know how else-”

“-how else to say it.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

For a few moments, they laid in silence, coiled around each other under the covers.

“I’ll always be here for you, Ino.” Sakura rubbed her nose against Ino’s. “Always.”

“Just like I’ll always be here for you.”

  
They stayed like that for some time. Eventually, Ino’s breathing began to slow, puffing hot against her cheek. Sakura waited until she knew for sure the other girl was asleep before she shifted onto her back, producing a book from under her pillow. She read in the half light of the winter moon while Ino slept soundly beside her.  _ I just hope she feels better now...  _


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw for mentions of dieting, food

Sakura awoke to the sound of sneezing. 

She stretched, several joints popping in protest. _I shouldn’t have stayed up so late. Ino’s always up so_ _early_ _. That book was just so interesting… _ She sat up. The light filtering in through the window was nearly blinding. _It must be snowing…_ The door creaked open and shut. Ino, now in a different set of Sakura’s clothes, sniffled as she wandered in and sank onto the bed.

“Something wrong?” Sakura asked as she crawled closer. Ino wrapped her arms around Sakura’s middle, head resting in her lap.

“Don’t feel good.”

Sakura pressed her hand to Ino’s forehead. She was damp from her shower, and for a second Sakura thought that’s why she felt warm, but then she caught Ino’s gaze for just a moment and she could see how glassy and bloodshot her eyes were.

“You have a fever. Why didn’t you wake me?”

“You were tired,” Ino mumbled.

“But you’re sick! I could have started treating you so much sooner!”

“It’s just a cold, there’s nothing you can really do about it and you know that.”

“I can’t cure it but that doesn’t mean I can’t make it a helluva lot better! Let me up!”

“Sakura, stop. Just stay in bed with me a while, okay?”

Her mouth moved to form the word “no”, but Ino tilted her head to look up at her and Sakura just… couldn’t. She couldn’t say no to those soft, pleading eyes, no matter how much she wanted to. She sighed to show her displeasure, but petted Ino’s hair affectionately all the same.

“Fine. Rest a bit. But as soon as you fall asleep I’m making you soup and medicine.” Ino’s laugh was muffled by the blankets and Sakura’s thighs.

Sakura plucked a comb off her bedside table and started carefully detangling Ino’s hair while it was still wet. Ino hummed contentedly. _She’s supposed to leave on a mission tomorrow. Will she be okay by then? Maybe I should ask Tsunade to send me instead. I know my skillsets aren’t_ _exactly_ _the same, and the guys wouldn’t be able to do the Ino-Shika-Chō combination with me if we get in trouble, but… I’m similar enough that it could work. And they’re nice enough, I wouldn’t mind going with them in her place. Then again, Ino would_ _kill_ _me if I tried to stop her from leaving. Sometimes she can be so stubborn…_

“Y’know, it’s funny. My family’s jutsu lets me read minds, but I don’t even need it to read yours.”

Sakura accidentally pulled too hard on a knot, startled, and Ino hissed in pain. 

“Sorry, sorry. I thought you were asleep. You surprised me.”

“I’m sorta asleep.” A silence stretched between them as Sakura resumed combing her hair, much more carefully this time. “The sickness is related to the depression. My immune system is shit and I was stressed out yesterday.” She sighed. “I bailed on the last mission because I wasn’t feeling well then, either. I wasn’t actually sick, just…” Sakura nodded. Ino didn’t have to finish the sentence for her to know what it meant. _Too depressed to leave her room._ “Yeah. So I can’t-” She quickly tucked her arm beneath her to cover her sneeze. “Sorry.” She sneezed again as she pushed herself up, and turned her face away as she sat up and a third sneeze overtook her.

“It’s okay. I appreciate you not sneezing in my lap or on my face. Thanks.”

“Wouldn’t be any use if both of us got sick.” She sneezed again. “For fuck’s sake!” Sakura snatched a box of tissues off her bedside table and handed it Ino. She loudly blew her nose. Her eyes were watery and cheeks a rosy pink. She looked as if she’d just come in from the cold. She coughed as she tossed the tissues in a trashcan nearby, laying down beside Sakura and squirming under the covers. Sakura placed the comb back down. _Clearly that’s the best we’re getting for now. She’s just gonna get it tangled again laying down like this._

Sakura shifted, tapping Ino’s arm until she rolled onto her back. Her hands began to glow green, and she glanced at Ino for permission. She nodded almost imperceptibly. Sakura placed her hands on Ino’s chest, exploring. _There’s no fluid build-up in her lungs. That’s good._ Her hands moved higher.

“Do you have a sore throat?”

“A little. It’s not bad.” Sakura nodded, pressing her fingers along Ino’s face. She nodded as she found the source of congestion and irritation.

“Sinus infection with post-nasal drip.”

“Figured as much.”

“Want me to do a culture? Just to be certain it’s not bacterial?”

“I’m telling you, Sakura, it’s fine. I just gotta rest.” She batted her hands away, and Sakura let the flow of chakra ebb. Ino curled up on her side, shutting her eyes. 

She decided she was going to make Ino soup. _It’s the kinda thing she’d like. She’s tried soup diets before, after all._ She snickered to herself a little. _I wonder how many fad diets she’s tried now? It seems like so many!_ Sakura waited until she was absolutely certain she was asleep before she carefully climbed over her to get off the bed and made her way downstairs. She began rummaging through the kitchen for ingredients, all the while watching the snow pile up outside. The window above the sink let in so much bright-white light, she didn’t even need to turn on the ceiling lamp. _Some storm out there. I wish Ino liked winter. I think the snow is so pretty…_

It took a while. Just like making medicine, food could be laborious and time consuming. She had to chop just enough veggies in just the right ways, get the ratio of spices exactly, make sure the broth didn’t end up too watery or too thick. Making medicine was often the same. Steeping plants or measuring chemicals, stirring or mixing or separating just the right way, in just the right amounts. Laboring over a stove and working at a counter was something she’d grown so accustomed to during her medical training. It was the part no one usually saw as she hid away in kitchens and labs to work, but it was one of the most important things she had learned. Knowing how to find the ingredients and the labor involved in each process allowed her to figure out ways to make medicine in the field. She could keep herself and a team fed and healthy in unfamiliar territory. She could heal wounds and treat illnesses even if she was out of chakra. 

She thought about this as she cooked. Ino’s footsteps padded down the stairs as she was spooning the soup into a bowl. She couldn’t find the ladle, so it was taking a little longer than she wanted to serve it.

“Hello, sunshine.” Ino grunted, sinking into a kitchen chair and clutching at her head. “Headache?”

“Mm-hm.” 

“Sorry.”

“Mm.”

“Here. I made you soup.” She placed the bowl in front of Ino. She’d only filled it halfway; she never ate much when she wasn’t feeling well. 

“Thanks.”

Sakura made herself a bowl as well, sitting down to join her. 

“I wish I could taste it,” she mumbled absently, even as she ate another spoonful. She sounded like her nose was stuffed, and the sore throat was definitely getting worse. Her voice had a hoarse, scratchy quality to it.

“Eh, it mostly tastes like kale. You’re not missing much,” Sakura replied, digging in herself. That was mostly a lie. It was delicious, the perfect blend of fresh vegetables and balanced spices. _There’s so many vitamins and nutrients in this, she’ll be feeling better in no time._ “I’ll put some in a thermos for you to bring on your mission. If you’re still up to going.”

“Doesn’t matter if I’m up to it or not. I gotta go.” She sneezed, cupping her face. “Fuck.” Sakura handed her a few paper napkins. She managed to keep her face covered as she blew her nose on one and cleaned her hand on the other. “I hate this.”

“I know. Being sick sucks.”

“Can’t even smell if I smell.”

“You took a shower this morning, there’s no way you smell.”

“I’m sweating, though.” Sakura had noticed and was determined not to bring it up, but since Ino brought up herself, she just nodded, handing her another napkin and gesturing for her to mop up her forehead. She dabbed at the sweat shining there. _I may have a big forehead, but she’s got a sweaty one,_ some mean little voice in the back of her head jeered. She ignored it.

“Yeah. But you don’t smell, I promise.”

“M’kay.” 

They shared the rest of the meal in silence. At one point, most of the way through her soup, Ino’s stomach growled. Sakura just smiled, refilling her bowl halfway again and retrieving some bread rolls. Ino gave her a small, grateful smile. 

“You’re a really good friend, you know that?” There was a little stabbing feeling in Sakura’s heart.

“I try my best.” _But my best still isn’t good enough for her to feel like I’m… more than a friend…_ Ino’s expression changed.

“I know what you’re thinking.”

“Stay out of my head, Ino-pig.” Ino stiffened at the familiar insult, the one that still stung a little. Sakura hated it, but it was one of the few ways she had to _make_ Ino hear her. 

“As if I’d want to be in there, Forehead Girl. It’s not my fault you wear your heart on your sleeve.” Now Sakura stiffened. Not at the insult, really, but at the second thing. _You wear your heart on your sleeve._

“Well at least I make my intentions and feelings _clear_.”

“Do you?”

“You know what I’m upset about, right?” 

Ino didn’t answer. _She knows exactly what I’m talking about, but here she goes, not even acknowledging it again…_

“You know we can’t, Sakura.”

“We can. You just don’t want to.”

“I don’t want to have this conversation right now.”

“That’s the thing, though: you _never_ want to have this conversation!” Where this time yesterday Ino had been desperate and hungry and longing, now Sakura was. But instead of being the comfort she needed, Ino turned away. _This is always the one thing. The one thing we can’t get past…_

“Do you blame me?”

Sakura wanted to crush something. Because _no_ , she didn’t blame her, _at all_ . The longer they delayed this conversation, the longer they delayed the inevitable fallout. The longer they delayed this conversation, the longer she could avoid having to tell others. The longer they avoided this conversation, the longer they could live the lives they always had. _But that’s not the life either of us wants. Why can’t she just admit that?_

“You can still do everything you want to do in life with me,” Sakura pleaded. “You can have everything.”

“My mother would never forgive me.”

“You don’t like her anyway! You’re always trying to piss her off! What better way to do it than this?”

“Stop it, Sakura!” Ino clutched at her head again. “Please, just stop. I can’t do this right now. I can’t.” She choked back a sob. “I can’t believe you’d even say that…”

She wasn’t sure when she’d stood up, but Sakura forced herself to sit back down now.

“I’m sorry.”

“You just don’t understand,” Ino whispered. “I can’t… use you like that. I don’t want to use you as a way to get back at her.”

“I know, I know. It was wrong for me to even suggest that. I’m sorry.”

“They’re relying on me to provide the next generation. I have to live, and have a kid, and pass on my clan’s jutsu and history. I’m the only one of this generation for our branch of the family, Sakura, don’t you understand that?”

“Of course I do. I’m the only one on my parents’ side, too, remember?”

“That’s different and you know it.”

Sakura gritted her teeth. She knew what that was supposed to mean. _Your clan isn’t powerful. Your clan isn’t special. You’re not even a member of the main branch. It’s not like anyone is really relying on you for anything. Your branch could die out and it wouldn’t bother anyone._ She forced her hands to lay flat on the table, instead of balled into fists. 

“And there’s nothing stopping you from continuing the clan. You could have anyone you want and I’d stand by you the whole time.”

“It’s not that simple, Sakura,” Ino denied. “I don’t… I don’t believe in that. If I’m going to be with someone, then I’m going to be with them and them only. If I choose you, I have to reject my role and my duties. I have to leave not just my family behind, but also the Ino-Shika-Chō allyship. There’d be no one to carry on the tradition.”

“And I’m telling you that things don’t have to be so black and white. You can be with me. I’m okay with you pursuing someone else with the… equipment necessary for you to have an heir. I’ll still be here, I’ll wait for you even. I just…” She closed her eyes, holding back tears hot with emotion. “I can’t give up on another person I love. I just can’t.”

Ino sighed.

“We can talk about it when I get back.” Something like… hope filled Sakura’s chest, opening like a flower in bloom.

“Really?”

“Yes. As soon as I get back. For now, can we just… chill?” Sakura smiled.

“Of course. Why don’t you sit on the couch while I clean this up?”  
“Okay.” Ino rose as Sakura reached over to remove the dishes. She paused in the doorway as Sakura ran the tap. “Where do you keep your medicine? My head’s still killing me.” She smiled.

“I’ll get it for you. Just take a rest.” Ino nodded. Her smile was soft and sad and reassuring all at once.

“Thank you.”

And Sakura knew what that really meant. _I love you._ She returned a similar smile.

“You’re welcome.” _I love you, too._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk how long it's gonna take to post the next chapter so please please be patient with me <3 love you all so much ( ᵕ̤ ‧̫̮ ᵕ̤ )


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i happened to write this chapter somewhat concurrently with the last one so i got done really quick?? think of it as me making up in advance for how long chapter 4 is gonna take to post (・・；) hehe
> 
> anyway, tw for medical stuff (nothing gorey or super intense but still)
> 
> edit: don't proofread after taking sleepy meds, kids. that's how you end up with ~*errors*~

Sakura found out from Tsunade that Ino and the others would only be gone a few days. Sakura kept herself busy in the meantime, trying not to worry. Truth be told, she welcomed the distractions of Tsunade and Kakashi’s assignments; they were both more than happy to indulge her workaholic tendencies, after all. Early in the morning, she trained with Tsunade. During the day she assisted Shizune under Tsunade’s direction in the hospital. In the evenings she met with Kakashi to train, perfecting the combat techniques Tsunade taught her earlier. She valued his constructive criticism and helpful pointers while they sparred. At night, she read and read and read. She remembered the days when Naruto would make fun of her for packing books as essential items on missions. He didn’t do that anymore, not since he realized how much she had learned from books and how useful most of that information was. If it wasn’t for her, he would have eaten poisonous berries four times over, been bitten by a veonomous snake at least twice, _and_ accidentally drugged himself. Her latest book was all about surviving in extreme conditions. _Hopefully I’ll never need this,_ she thought, _but it’s always better to know than not know._ So she read about how to travel in a desert alone, and how to keep warm in a tundra, and how to evacuate a village from an active volcano or a tsunami. 

Team 10 returned to Konoha on the fourth day. Sakura had decided to wait for Ino at her house. Her parents were glad to see her; her mother said that they had made up when Ino returned home before leaving for her mission and she suspected Sakura’s influence had something to do with it. She had merely shrugged, unwilling to take credit for any of it. She hadn’t even encouraged Ino to apologize or try to make amends. But her mother wouldn’t hear of it, and Inoichi himself had stood behind his wife to mouth “just go with it” at her, so go with it she did. Sakura was in Ino’s room now. She intended to stay for a while, and had simply come up to put her stuff down. She stared at her medical pack. _Ino’s gonna make fun of me for bringing this. Or be mad. But you never know what kind of state someone might come home in, and I’d rather be safe than sorry._

She heard the front door open downstairs, and the voices of Ino’s parents drifted up the stairs.

“Welcome home!”

“Ino, is something wrong?”

“Ino!” There was the sound of breaking glass. Sakura grabbed her medical supplies and bolted down the stairs. 

She was splayed out on the floor, breathing heavily, a broken vase on the floor beside her. She groaned as she pushed herself back up, swaying on her hands and knees. Sakura dropped down beside her, snapping on a pair of gloves and pulling a mask over her face.

“I got this,” she said to her parents. “Lay down, let me check you out.” Ino swatted at her hands. 

“‘M fine.”

“You’re not fine. Stop wiggling!” Ino did not stop wiggling, trying to get up and bat Sakura out of the way.

“Sweetheart,” Inoichi said. 

“‘M busy, Dad.”

“Take a rest, why don’t you?” he soothed, tapping at her forehead with a chakra-infused finger. “You must be so very tired, aren’t you?” Her eyes started to roll back, and her struggling ceased as she started going limp.

“Yeah…” she murmured. 

“Sleep now, darling. You’ll feel better soon.”

“Okay…” 

Just like that, Ino fell into a deep sleep.

“Did you just… _jutsu_ our daughter?!” Ino’s mother hissed.

“Natsumi, honey, it was just a little sleepy jutsu, that’s all-”

“You _jutsued_ our _daughter_?!”

“First off, it’s not a verb. Second off-”

Sakura shook her head, ignoring them as her hands wandered Ino’s body, searching for problems. _I remember she was having trouble with her sinuses…_ She couldn’t find any signs of infection in the sinus cavities, nor any swelling. But her face was flushed, a fever clearly spiking, her skin clammy. Her hands moved to Ino’s throat. _Nothing weird there either…_ She coughed as her hands moved to her chest. _Found it._ Sakura shook her head. _I knew she shouldn’t have gone on that mission. The sinus infection cleared up, but her immune system was still depressed. Now she’s got fucking pneumonia, which is way worse. Fuck, look at that fluid build-up…_

“Is everything okay, Sakura?” She looked up. Ino’s parents had stopped arguing. Now they just looked worried. She forced a smile.

“She’s got a pretty nasty respiratory infection. Nothing I can’t fix, though! I’m just going to move her to her bedroom so she’s more comfortable and so I can run some tests.” It wasn’t a lie, really. Pneumonia _is_ a type of respiratory infection. And people of their generation tended to freak out at the word “pneumonia”, so she’d learned to use "respiratory infection" instead. It would keep them calm, thus keep Ino calm, and once she was sure Ino was stable and on the mend she could casually slip it in to conversation.

“Okay, do you need-”

Sakura clipped her med pack around her waist and easily picked her up bridal-style, blinking innocently at Inoichi.

“Do I need what?”  
“Uh… nevermind.”

“Thank you for taking care of our daughter.” Natsumi jabbed Inoichi in the ribs.

“Y-yes, of course, thank you,” he said, bowing a little. Sakura smiled.

“No problem! See you in a bit!”

With that she hustled up the stairs, and once she was out of sight let her face drop back into a serious expression. She pulled down the covers and laid Ino in her bed, just as she promised, rearranging the pillows to support her in an upright position. She began to cough, and Sakura quickly sent chakra to her hands, catching the sputum. She produced a vial from her med pack and pulled the sputum as gently as she could up Ino’s throat. The mucus dropped easily into the container. _Perfect._ She sealed it with a little cork just to be safe. She’d hate to lose the sample. She walked over to Ino’s desk and cleared a space, laying down a scroll. A puff of smoke, and before her was a microscope and a plate of nutrients. She dropped the vial’s contents into the plate. _If it’s bacterial, then we’ll find out soon which one it is. Then I can pull an antibiotic. If not, then at least I'll know to focus on symptom management instead. Does she have any allergies…?_ Another small plume of smoke, and Ino’s medical record appeared before her. She flipped through it. _So glad Tsunade gave me access to the medical files. This helps a lot, especially when I’m in the field and can’t go to the hospital myself…_ She found the allergy listings. _I knew she was allergic to something! Thank god it’s not an antibiotic. Just gotta make sure I don’t give her anything with codeine in it…_ She let the file poof away, and instead had an IV drip set-up appear. It was pre-filled with a hydrating solution. She wheeled it over to Ino’s bedside, carefully inserting the needle into her arm. _This should help. I have no doubt she’s dehydrated._ She pressed a chakra-covered hand to her forehead. _Yeah, she’s approaching the danger zone here. Let’s get her fever down while I wait for the culture…_

Sakura tapped at her forehead, dispersing the “sleepy jutsu” her father had used earlier. Her eyes opened halfway, groggy. 

“Sakura? What’s going on?” She covered her mouth as she coughed, leaning forward in an attempt to clear her airways. Sakura rummaged through her pack for a cup, handing it to her. She spat into, hacking. When the episode faded, she leaned back again. Sakura poured some sanitizer into her gloved hands and rubbed it onto Ino’s. “What’re you doing?” she asked.

“Sanitizing so you don’t infect a different part of your body if you touch it.” Ino nodded a little, still catching her breath.

“So smart.”

“Mm-hm.” She set the cup in a nearby trashcan. “Does your chest hurt?”

“Yeah…” She shivered, and that set off another round of coughing. Sakura took that as an opportunity to gather some ibuprofen pills and the water off Ino’s nightstand.

“I gotta say, Ino, props to you for finishing the mission in this condition,” she said, mostly to distract her as she popped the pills into her mouth and raised the cup to her lips before she could protest. “I’d be pissed if I wasn’t so impressed.” Ino swallowed the pills and water, chuckling hoarsely along with another cough.

“I’m a tough broad.”

“The toughest.

“Are my parents away?” 

“No, they’re just downstairs. Do you want them? I could-”

Ino placed her hand over Sakura’s before she could fully rise, patting it until she sat back down.

“Let ‘em be,” she said. “I want you.” Sakura smiled, enfolding Ino’s hand in hers. Ino smiled back, letting her eyes shut again. “I promised we’d talk, didn’t I?”

“Ino, please. You’re not well. It can wait until-”

“Then at least let me say this.” Sakura waited patiently for Ino to catch her breath. She was starting to shiver, non-stop this time. “I’m sorry. I said things in a way that hurt you on purpose, and I… I shouldn’t have.” Sakura clenched her jaw. “It was mean and kinda passive-aggressive and… I’m really sorry.” Sakura nodded, clearing her throat.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry I picked a fight with you while you were sick. And right before a mission. I know how much you hate that and it was low of me to wait until you were vulnerable. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

Ino’s voice was lost to another coughing fit. She coughed so hard a vein in her forehead became visible, leaning forward again. Sakura patted her back, trying to loosen up the congestion. When the fit ended, she gently guided her back to the pillows.

“Rest up. I’ll get you more medicine soon.”

“M’kay…” This time, Ino fell asleep of her own accord. For a little while, Sakura just watched her, monitoring her breathing. _She may be stubborn and vain and catty, but… Ino really is a good girl. She’s got a heart of gold underneath her prickliness. I can hardly be blamed for loving her like I do…_ She sighed to herself. The room seemed far emptier than it should have. _I just hope that whatever decision she makes, she makes it for her. I don’t want to see her live her life for others’ expectations instead of her own happiness. She deserves, above all else, to be happy…_ Her gaze dropped to her lap. _I would do anything to make you happy, Ino. Please…_

The tick-tocking of the clock seemed louder than ever. The culture took its sweet time developing. Ino’s breathing was still too shallow, too fast, interrupted at times by coughing in her sleep. All Sakura could do was wait. For the culture, for Ino to feel better, for their talk. For her future to be determined. _Will I ever get a happily ever after, or am I doomed to have my heart broken?_ Only time would tell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like nothing really happened in this chapter ahhhhh but i hope you liked it anyway (*´ω｀*) i promise the convo Will Happen just please be patient lol. love you!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you everyone for your patience with me in uploading ｡(*^▽^*)ゞ i hope you enjoy it!

Sakura stayed at Ino’s bedside as much as she could, but had to leave frequently to tend to patients in the hospital. This year’s flu strain was particularly difficult, putting shinobi out of commission faster than they could track it. This, of course, included medic-nin, who along with their civilian peers were on the frontlines of disease control. Sakura was needed now more than ever, and she ran herself ragged trying to care for everyone at once.

She replaced the damp cloth on Ino’s forehead. She groaned, eyes opening to tiny slits. She covered her mouth as she coughed. Sakura pressed her hand to Ino’s sternum, rubbing her thumb there to soothe her. It was a little trick she’d picked up in the pediatrics ward. Ino’s breathing was tight and labored. She was responding to the antibiotics, and for a few days she’d started to look better. So much better, in fact, that Ino had decided to try training again, against Sakura’s orders. Now she was only marginally better than when she started.

“I’m sorry, Sakura. I didn’t know she was supposed to be on bedrest,” Shikamaru said. She waved a dismissive hand. 

“Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. It can’t be helped that she’s a stubborn brat.” Ino swatted at Sakura’s arm.

“Stop talking about me like I’m not here. I’m sick, not comatose.”

“I’ll give you your autonomy back when you start making reasonable decisions.”

Ino pouted, any retort she might have come up with dying in her throat as she coughed again. Sakura helped her sit up, pressing a stethoscope to her chest.  _ She might need a temporary inhaler. I don’t like the sound of that wheeze…  _

“Do you need me to do anything?” Shikamaru asked. Sakura shook her head.

“It’s best if you go home, get some vitamin C, and rest. If you come down with symptoms, alert me immediately.” He nodded, shuffling out. Sakura set her stethoscope aside, unfurling her scroll and making an asthma pump appear.

“The hell is that?” Ino asked.

“Inhaler.”

“Why?”

“You’re wheezing.”

“Am not.”

“Are too.”

Sakura shoved it in Ino’s mouth. 

“I’m gonna press down. Inhale and hold it a few seconds, then release.” Ino glowered, but she took the dose anyway. Holding her breath made her cough. Sakura patted her back, trying to soothe her. “You’re doing a great job, Ino. Just one more, okay?” Ino nodded, accepting the inhaler this time and taking her dose without fighting. Sakura nodded, placing the inhaler on the nighttable and preparing Ino’s next dose of medicine. 

“Sakura…?” 

She turned. Ino looked small and sad in her bed. It made a part of Sakura’s heart break.

“Are you mad at me?” The broken part snapped off entirely.

“Of course not, honey, of course not,” she assured, wrapping her up in a hug and petting her hair. Ino sniffled into her shoulder, holding back tears. “I’m just worried for you. You’re not taking care of yourself.” Ino hugged her back, so tight it almost hurt.

“I know, I’m sorry. I just… I feel so worthless. If I can’t work, then what good am I?”

Against her will, anger flared within her.

“You are never worthless,” she said through gritted teeth. “You are worth something because you’re here. It doesn’t matter if you can work or not.” Sakura wiped a stray tear from Ino’s cheek. “Besides, this is temporary. Just a minor setback.” Ino nodded, but she didn’t seem convinced. Sakura sighed, stretching a little. “Alright, I know what’ll make you feel better.” She took off her mask and gloves. 

“Why are you ungearing?”

“Because I want you to know this isn’t Nurse Sakura doing this, it’s Friend Sakura.  _ Your _ Sakura.” She pulled her hair out of the short, spiky ponytail she’d had it in, leaving her hairband on the nighttable. She took Ino’s hand in hers, tugging gently. “C’mon. Let’s get you in the tub.”  _ The steam might help clear her airways, too, so it’s a double benefit…  _

Ino was a little unsteady on her feet. Sakura noted it, tucking that bit of information away for later.  _ Maybe a different pump, then, if this one makes her too shaky…  _ She led her by the arm to the bathroom. Even with her mother working downstairs, it seemed much too quiet in the house without her dad stomping around. He’d left on a mission earlier that morning.

Ino undressed in the room behind her while Sakura ran the water, testing it with her fingers. It was warm and inviting. She twisted her neck around a few times, pulling the sore muscles in her shoulders.  _ Mm, a bath would be so nice. At least I’ll get to shower…  _ She stood back up, pulling the cover over the tub and stretching her arms over her head. Ino had disrobed by the time she returned to the wet room, shivering a little. Sakura pressed her hand to her forehead, tsking.  _ She’s not too warm. I’ll just have to be careful with the bath water…  _ Sakura undressed quickly and professionally, as if she were changing out of her scrubs.  _ I hope Ino improves soon. I feel terrible for her. And honestly, I need a day off. It’s been so difficult caring for her here and then all the other patients at the hospital. I haven’t been sleeping... _ She was hardly even paying attention to her surroundings, let alone to what her hands were doing. Ino’s voice was what brought her back to the present moment.

“Why are you folding your clothes? Won’t you just wear my pajamas?” Sakura blinked confusedly.

“Huh. Yeah, you’re right. I’m not sure why I’m doing that.” 

She abandoned the task halfway through, steering Ino around with a hand between her shoulder blades. She shut the door between the two spaces, turning on the water and waiting a moment for it to heat up. She pulled a stool around, gesturing for Ino to sit under the spray. She nearly collapsed into it, looking tired. She had a few scrapes and bruises from training with Shikamaru. Sakura tsked amusedly.  _ She always find a way to goad him into trying harder than he wants to, so they end up with minor injuries…  _ Sakura was gentle with her washing. Ino’s soap smelled of lavender, her shampoo of juniper and lemon. Ino’s skin was soft despite the harsh winter weather.  _ I’ll have to steal some of her lotion. My hands are ruined from the weather and the sanitizers…  _

“Sakura?”

“Yes, hun.”

“I…” 

Sakura cocked her head to the side, waiting. Ino’s face was turned away, refusing to make any sort of eye contact.

“I’m sorry I went out against your orders. It was stupid of me.” Sakura shook her head as she started to wash herself. It was strange using Ino’s soap and shampoo. There was something incredibly intimate about smelling like her.

“I understand, Ino. You weren’t doing it to be spiteful.” Ino nodded, still sitting on the stool, watching Sakura wash.

“I just wanted to feel useful.”

“I know, I know. It’s okay. Just focus now on getting better again, okay?”

Ino nodded. Sakura rinsed herself, offering a hand to help Ino up. She led her to the bathtub, pulling back the cover. 

“Careful,” she warned as she helped Ino step in. She sank into the water with a sigh. Sakura couldn’t help but smile. “Rest here a while. I’ll bring you some clothes-” Ino caught her wrist. Sakura turned back confusedly.

“A-actually, I was thinking, Sakura… would you like to bathe with me?” Sakura blinked a few times.  _ We’ve never bathed together in our homes before, just at the onsen. Does she intend this as a just friends thing, or something more…?  _ Ino shifted, gesturing for Sakura to get in front of her. She only hesitated a moment.  _ Fuck it, my muscles hurt. I’ll figure out what this is supposed to mean later…  _

Sakura bit back a moan. The warm water lapped at her skin. It felt so nice. She felt as if she’d been standing for days.  _ How long has it been since I just let myself rest? How long has it been since I just took a bath? _ Ino pulled at her arm, and Sakura cracked an eye open.

“Come this way. I’d like to hold you…. If that’s okay.” Sakura wouldn’t admit to blushing. She just turned around and laid back against Ino’s chest. She sighed heavily. Ino played absently with her wet hair. “Thank you,” she whispered.

“You kidding? Thank  _ you _ .”

For a few moments, they just shared a warm, comfortable silence. Sakura felt herself finally relaxing.  _ If I’m not careful, I’ll fall asleep…  _

“Sakura?” Ino called, softly. 

“Mm-hm?”

“I choose you.”

Her eyes shot open.  _ What?! _

“I’ve been wanting to tell you for days,” she continued, stroking Sakura’s arm now instead. “When I was away, I met this gorgeous kunoichi. She was a doctor, and she worked with her partner. Her  _ wife _ .” Sakura swallowed. “And they had a child together. She gave me a scroll that details how it’s done. A combination of medicine and ninjutsu. No third person involved at all.”  _ No… third person…?  _ “It opened my eyes. I… I love you, Sakura, I want to be with you. I was just so scared that I would let people down, and I let my fears and worries about others would think get in the way. My only regret is that it took me this long to fully accept my feelings, and accept you. So… please, forgive me…”

Ino sniffled. Sakura clamored to turn around, heedless of the water sloshing out of the tub. She gathered Ino in her arms, cradling her close, tears in her eyes, too.

“There’s nothing to forgive, Ino. You were trying to do what was right for you and your family. You were trying to think about the clan’s future  _ and _ yours. That must have been such a terrible burden to carry.” She wiped Ino’s tears. “I was selfish for not trying harder to understand. I’m sorry for making you feel guilty about your indecision. It was reasonable.” Ino clung to her. Their hearts beat in tandem.

“You were right, Sakura. We  _ can _ have everything.” 

Sakura choked out a noise somewhere between a sob and a laugh.  _ We.  _ She never thought simple conjugation could fill her with so much joy. She was so happy, it almost hurt.  _ We. We’re “we” now. We, us. Me and you, together…  _

“Everything, Ino. I’ll give you the world, and the moon, and all the stars, if that’s what you want.” She laughed a little against Sakura’s shoulder.

“I’m not sure I can promise the world or the moon or the stars, but I can promise that you’ll be  _ my _ world. You’ll be  _ my _ moon and stars. And what I’ll give you is my heart. Forever and ever.” Sakura hugged her harder, her quiet crying turning quickly to full-body sobs. Ino petted her hair. “Please tell me these are happy tears, Sakura.” She nodded vigorously, too overcome with emotion to speak. “Mine, too. Mine, too…” 

They stayed in the bath until their skin started to wrinkle. They sniffled and smiled as they dried each other off. They wore towels back to the bedroom, and in there they both changed into Ino’s pajamas. Ino beckoned Sakura to the bed with a little grabbing motion. She hesitated.

“But your mother is home.” Ino pouted. 

“I don’t care. I don’t care what she thinks about it. What anyone thinks of it. If the doctor and her nurse wife in Sand can be happy, then we can, too.” Sakura couldn’t control how wide her smile became. She climbed in eagerly next to Ino, wrapping her arms around her again.

“It almost doesn’t feel real,” she breathed. Ino smirked, and Sakura jolted at the sharp pinch in her side. “Ow! What was that for?!”

“See? It is real.” Sakura batted playfully at Ino’s head, and she whined exaggeratedly.

“Brat,” Sakura teased. 

They settled down, giggling. Sakura traced Ino’s lowest ribs with the tips of her fingers. Ino shifted onto her back, idly twisting Sakura’s hair again. Ino’s fever had almost completely subsided. The hacking cough, though, was beginning to return.  _ So the inhaler only provides an hour or so of relief. She might need a stronger dose…  _ Ino tapped at her forehead, dispersing the wrinkle forming between her brows.

“No thinking. Just sleep,” she insisted. Sakura sighed a little, adjusting the angle of her head.

“Only if you sleep, too.” Ino gave a breathy snort.

“Don’t have to tell me twice.”

Sure enough, within moments Ino was out cold. Sakura snickered a little under her breath, shifting around again until she was comfortable.  _ I can’t believe it. I get to spend the rest of my life with her. And I’ll never have to go through the pain of seeing her with someone else, the pain I was so ready to endure for her. Love is so strange…  _

Sakura felt refreshed when she awoke. It was dark, and a flurry was falling outside. Ino looked peaceful, more peaceful than she had in days. Sakura’s knuckles ran soft across her cheek. She left a note beside her.

_ Ino- _

_ I had to go home and get ready for my next shift at the hospital. _

_ Twelve hours this time. I'll be back as soon as I can. _

_ Stay in bed, take your medicine, and drink lots of water. _

_ Try to eat, please. _

_ I already miss you. _

__

_ I love you. _

_ -Sakura _

  
__ Sakura’s heart felt light as she left through the window, leaping between rooftops. She looked at the moon, drenching the whole village silver.  _ “You’ll be my moon and my stars.”  _ Sakura smiled.  _ I’ll be everything you need, Ino. I promise. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! this was my first f/f fic. i hope it was good! i just love them together *:ﾟ*｡⋆ฺ(*´◡`) i look forward to writing more fics in the future!


End file.
